Being Dad.

Beep...Beep...Beep....As I sit here, this is what I hear. Yesterday morning, while driving to Rochester with bags packed, I pulled up an email on my iPhone. It was a "Check-In" email from American Airlines asking me to check-in for my international flight. See at that moment I was due to fly out of Rochester Airport headed to Antigua, Guatemala to shoot with my friend, Clayton Austin. It was one of those trips that you weren't sure would everrr get here! I'd researched the hotel/museum where we were to stay and the three volcanoes that surround Antigua. I had wondered if I shouldn't learn a few spanish words just so I didn't order the local delicacy. (The plan was to stick close to the Pollo.) As I clicked the "check-in" button there was an inner battle happening.

See, Monday evening my little lady was not feeling well. I was in the studio working on recording the next Brothers McClurg album when I got a call that she was being taken to the local ER.  From there I got another saying that she was being transported by a medical team to Strong Hospital in Rochester. I finished up and headed to the hospital. The plan was that she just needed to get her oxygen levels up and the chest congestion down. On Tuesday night I stayed home so I could pack for my trip. Then after a short stop at the hospital the next morning, I would be on my way. So morning comes and after packing the car, trekking to the Strong, and arriving at Faba's room it hit me like a ton of bricks. She looked at me so sad. She was finishing a yogurt breakfast as I picked up her tube covered body. It was maybe 2 minutes before she began coughing and proceeded to give her yogurt breakfast back. My heart was broken. I knew this was the moment I had a decision to make. I looked across the bed at Marla and knew. I walked out into the unit hallway and called Clayton.

It was a defining moment for me. I was dad, I was husband, and I was content. I realized how much they needed me and how much I needed them. I needed to be here. To be barfed on. To be cried on. To be slept on. To be selfless.

We are battling what seems like RSV and it's been an extremely rough day, but we're making progress. I'm glad of my decision and I'm glad I'm dad. Antigua, it's not over! Here's a shot of the teenie one in her prison crib from the faithful Ol' iPhone.

"We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps." Proverbs 16:9